Friday, August 21, 2009

Fresh!!

Sorry I have been gone for so long! But I had some really hard decisions to make. We got both kids off to school and now our house is empty, quiet and clean. Very strange.
I know I have talked about how unhappy I have been with my trainer and how torn I was on what the right thing to do was. Well I FINALLY made a decision. I told him yesterday that I would not be training with him for awhile. I did not go into all my reason I didn't feel like it was necessary. I told him it was financial which is not a complete lie. My husband has been out of work for 14 months and I have yet to find anything as well. I do believe this will help relieve a little stress not having to fork out that money each month. But of course with leaving comes all kinds of fear. Can I do this on my own? How will I do this? What should I eat? What kind of goals should I set myself? The list goes on and on. I am not sure of all the answers right now but I do know one thing I feel at peace with my decision and I am ready to move forward. His constant pyscho babble with not be missed. His constant hounding me about my weight will not be missed. I just want to train hard and transform my body!
I girl that I have know from Sparkspeople for quite some time has an online training service. I trust her and I will be talking with her today to pick her brain on where I should go from here. I have talked to quite a few people the last few days and the more I talk to them the more confused I become. Most just want my money and want to train me but I do not want to be put in a situation that I just got out off. I deserve more than that. I am going to listed to my gut! So far there is one guy that I would consider going to if I am not able to do this on my own. I am going to give myself three month doing it SOLO and see what happens.
I will finish up training with my trainer until the end of the month and then the new journey begins.
Stay tuned I will be blog my new journey.

1 comment:

Brit-Man said...

Kathi, I think that there is no reason why you can't do this yourself. You have understanding, maturity and the inner strength to push forwards, and make the coming three months a realisation, of what you CAN do, and what you ARE capable of.

You really are such an amazing Lady and I am sure there is nothing right now, that is above you, where your training, dedication, focus, emotional strength and mental mindset are concerned.

You honestly, honestly have the emotional and mental tools, to see the coming months of training and diet changes work for you.

You just need to look at that person on your blog. The person you used to be, and see that you are really capable of so, so much misses.

You've doen an absolutely brilliant job, of pushing hard, and overcoming emotional, mental and dietry obstacles, in all the time you've been doing this.

You CAN believe in yourself, and you DO have that strength. I know it, and I can sense it in you and anytime it feels difficult, or you have one of those days, where it just seems to be a little overwhelming, please do get in touch, and certainly the additional support and encouragement you're looking for will be there for you, if you ever want any more from me, that is totally unconditional :-).

I want to wish you so much luck and best wishes with this, and please don't apologise for anything. You have a life, and that must come first. Whatever you do in life, I know you will do it well.

I remain very proud to be someone who is following and witnessing the re-birth of a Lady, who is such an inspiration and a wonderful shining light.

You deserve to be proud of yourself, for everything, and you have my word, that my support will be yours for as long as you want it.

Take care Kathi, and GOOD LUCK again. You CAN, you really CAN do this.

You ARE such a capable and able person.

:-) :-) :-).

Matt