Sunday, March 8, 2009

WAITING

I think the hardest part is not knowing when this feeling will end. I struggle with keeping my spirits up and be patient as I wait for this vertigo to subside. It has been hard to sit in self pity and depression. But I am strong and if anyone can get through this it will be me!!
It is hard to tell if it is getting better. I am able to get down the stairs and I made my oatmeal this morning by myself. I still have difficult with balance and I still have this weird "rock the boat feeling" most of the time.
I was talking to my neighbor who know someone who had this very same thing happen to her. I talked to her and it gave me a sense of peace. She was very helpful and gave me suggestions. She said that she had and MRI, did all these exercise and nothing seem to help. Her husband began to do some research on the Internet and came across this herb that is helpful with vertigo. She said she began taking it and it went away. She continues to take it to this day but it was the only thing that help. So I was hopeful that it would help me too. I had Paul pick it up yesterday and I began taking it. She did say it took about a week or two week before she started feeling better. But it gives me hope and that is something I need right now. Since the medicine they gave me at the hospital didn't seem to help. So I took my second dose today and I just wait it out.
I was hopeful that maybe I was going to feel good enough to head back to train clients on Monday but that doesn't look like it is going to happen. I text Dick yesterday letting him know what was going on. He said that he would take care of it and just focus on getting better. Anyone that know me, knows how difficult it is for me to let go of control. So I am having a difficult time letting this one go. But there really isn't anything I can do. And that is another thing that is difficult to except. There is nothing that I can DO to make this go away. I hate it! I am a doer, controller and fighter. I guess that it was my emotions have been so down. But today is a new day and I have to stay strong and positive and hope this goes away soon.
I want to say a special thanks to everyone who has and continues to pray for me. I know that our prayers were answered and this is just yet another detour in my road of life. Special thanks to Gale, Sue, Micaelea, Sue, Tristann, Debi and anyone else I might have forgotten to mention. Through this experience I have seen how truly blessed I have been to have such wonderful people surrounding me and supporting me. THANK YOU!!

2 comments:

Linda said...

Sending you prayers, love and hugs!

Frankenboob said...

I know how you feel although, I didn't have it as bad as you. It finally went away on its own. I really feel for you and am sending prayers your way. I am going through stuff too. Hope you get well from this soon.