Ready for some "FOOTBALL?"

We arrived home from the football game around 5:30 last night. I was hot sweaty and glad to be home. Of course I didn't sit down I got busy right away. I chopped salad and cabbage for dinner. For dinner I had two of these:
"In a Jiffy Spelt veggie burgers" I just love these and I like having a supply in the freezer at all times. I had two of them both put one slice of ezekiel bread with homemade tomato paste and spinach, YUM! I also had a big side salad. I cooked up some cabbage but decided not to eat it and save it for another day. I am really trying to focus more on veggies as my main stable for dinners and everything else a smaller side. I had to share what I made Friday night for dinner.

I made a delicious homemade pizza. I threw the ingredients for the pizza dough in my bread maker and let it do the work. This crust turns out fabulous and I love the fact that I just put it in the machine and let it go.

I topped it with a little olive oil with crushed garlic, fresh sliced plum tomatoes, basil and mozzarella.

Fabulous. I packed up a few cold pieces for a quick lunch at the football game. I love cold pizza. Of course I fed the "meat" eater a italian sausage pizza. He was quite delighted. Still trying to find our happy medium for the meater eater and nonmeater.

Are you ready for some football?

Our son is number 73. We lovedfootball and we were eager to see how the team was going to do this year. They have a whole new coaching staff. This is our sons first year of eligibility as a sophomore at Truman State University. We were thrilled to hear that he was able to be a part of the traveling team and conventionally the first game was a short two hours from our home.

Although he did not see any playing time today it was great to be able to spend a little time with him after the game and it is always great to see him suited up. They looked pretty good but definately have some things to work on. They ended up winning the game 23 -13.

I decided to take the weekend off from any formal exercise. I can't rememeber the last time I took some major down time. Have you every taken a few days off from exercise? Did you feel guilty about it? Was it difficult to get back in the swing after taking a few days off? I am really trying to focus on listening to my body and being ok "relaxing" a little.

Who says you "NEED" meat?

It has been over a week since I have eaten meat and I have to say I am not really missing it. I have never been a huge meat lover and this vegetarian diet has been working out wonderfully. I have been truly enjoying all my eats and isn't that what life is all about? Enjoyment!
Tonight I made a spicy tofu rueben sandwich...
Doesn't it look devine? It was ezekiel toasted bread, tofu fried into brown and crispy.

Saurkraut, swiss cheese....

And a sauce made of lite mayo, ketchup, sweet pickle relish and a little hot sauce. You have to give this a try it was fabulous. I could have easily eaten two of these. I also fried up some cabbage and topped it with mustard and splenda. Yes I haven't quite been able to give up everything. I am working on it!

I went to my therapist today and we did a hypnosis session. Have you every done hypnosis? What are you thought about it? It was so relaxing and I felt really good after. I am hopeful it will help me to a better, more full filling life.

Hubby was gone to a business open house so he was probably thrilled to finally be able to eat meat! Does anyone live with a partner who is not a vegetarian/vegan? How do you cook your meal? It has been kind of hard. Part of me want him just to jump the the bandwagon with me and another part want to respect his wishes. I hope we can find a happy medium so where.

I have been really tired all week and not sure if I have had the best workouts. Part of me want to just give my body a break and rest a few days but another part wants me to suck it up and just do it. Do you every have this? How do you deal with it?

My son called yesterday and he made second team for the football team. So he will be traveling with the team for the first game. We are thrilled for him. He has worked hard and it has truly paid off for him. The bonus for us is that the first game is in Indiana and is only 2 hours from our home. We will be going to the game. I am excited and looking forward to seeing him.

Tomorrow is Friday! I thought it would never get here.

Yes, I don't know, No!

I have never been good about making a decision and today was no different. One of my "BIG" dreams it to run my own restaurant. I have never cook in a restaurant and so I made a decision a few weeks ago that I would attempt to find a job working in a commercial kitchen. This would give me a big wake up call as to what it is "REAL" like. I saw a job for a cook position at a local nursing home. I filled out the application and pretty much forgot about it since I have ZERO experience. They called me today and wanted to interview today. Of course I was a nervous wreck! I talked to my husband and he cheered me on and told me I had NOTHING to lose. He told me to just be myself. So that is what I did. I really enjoy the lady who interviewed me and she was willing to give me a chance if I wanted. I would have to act quickly if I wanted to take it. She told me if I wanted the job that I would have to have a drug test and physical today and go to orientation tomorrow and Friday. I sat there in shock and did not know what to say. When I finally could speak I told her that I would to found out from my current employer if I could get tomorrow and Friday off and that I would call her and let her know by 3:00. It was around 1:30 when I left. My mind was racing and I had know idea what to do. First I told myself Yes and then I said I don't know. I called my husband immediately for support. He is always so calm in these kinds of situation. He told me that I would have to decide for myself if it was really worth it or not and only I could decide. I had to really sit down and think about it. It was really difficult because I really wanted to have an opportunity to work in a kitchen and get some experience behind my belt but it was such little notice and the following week I would have to do orientate and work my other job which meant working seven days. I just didn't think I could do it. I finally made my decision if they truly wanted me to work there they would work something out. I called her and said that I was not able to make orientation with such short notice from my other employer. She said ok and maybe next time. I have to admit I was heart broken. I felt like this would only be my opportunity. Deep down inside I felt what they were asking from me wasn't fair to me and that I deserved better. I know part of my emotions was based on not wanting to let anyone down but it ultimately it came down to what was best for ME. I really am proud of myself and this was huge for me.

This past weekend I saw a recipe from Heather for Seitan. I cooked it up and it has sat in my refrigerator every since. I had no idea what to do with and I have to admit I was scared to try it. But I decided to do it tonight.

I have a recipe for Mongolian Beef and I thought it was a perfect way to hide it from my husband.

I started of by cutting up the seitan in to beef type slices and coating it with cornstarch.

Next I cooked it up in oil until it started to brown.

Then I added the sauce. Doesn't it look delicious? The sauce was a combination of soy sauce, water, brown sugar and red pepper flakes.

I served it over brown rice. The verdict: I "LOVED" it! I am so glad that I was willing to give it a chance. And for my hubby: I almost had him fooled he said it looked just like beef but it had not quite as "robust" flavor. I don't if he was trying to convince himself that he didn't like it as much as beef or not. I am really looking forward to cooking with it again.

I also added a delicious big salad to go with it. I haven't been eating quite as much vegetables as I would like so this was perfect. This meal was very satisfying and I am still full.

Good Bye are SO hard!

Our daughter wanted to come home this weekend before she starts classes a week from Monday. We went and picked her up Thursday night and she stayed the weekend. You would think that her being gone almost a year now that it would be easy dropping her off today. NOT
I got all teary eyed as we drove a way.
My husband and I have raised two wonderful children but damn do I miss them. Anyone who is reading this and has kids at home, enjoy every minute you have because before you know they will be gone. Don't get me wrong I am glad that I have raised very independent children but it still does not make the heartache go away.
I woke up early this morning and wanted to make a few things for her to take back with her. I had attempted to make pitas before and it was a big FAIL but I was determined that I would get it right. So I decided to try again. I put them on my pizza stone instead this time. I put the first pita on the stone in a 500 degree oven for 4-5 minutes. I crossed my fingers and waited.
When I opened the oven this is what I found.....

Success! I was so excited and it sure did build my confidence in my cooking abilities. After they come out of the oven you wrapped them in tinfoil to cool.

As they cook they deflate and the pocket inside remains.

Of course when lunch came around I had to try one. I had some left over homemade falafel I had made a few days ago so I stuffed it with a falafel and cucumber sauce. Perfect ! I wish I would have taken a picture but I was so excited to eat I forgot all about it.

I have been playing around with my diet to find the foods that I feel works well for "MY" body. I am doing a more vegetarian type diet focusing more on vegetables. I am going to listen to my body and see how I do. So tonight I had some edamame that was in the freezer that needed to eaten so I cook up Edamame Stir fry.

It was really good and I like that it was a really big portion. The only problem with going a more vegetarian diet is that I live with a meat eater. I am curious to hear from others that have this same situation. How do you deal with it? Make two different meals? I know my husband is open to different foods but I know he doesn't want to give up meat. I look forward to seeing how everyone else deals with this situation. I am off to pack my lunch for tomorrow. Back to work.

Emotions!

Have you ever had emotions so deep that it difficult to show them and when they appear they are fierce? I had that this morning. I am a very emotional /sensitive person but you would never know it. I hold a great steel armour around myself to protect me. This armour has not served me well. But it is one that is difficult to shed.
Something happen yesterday, that I will not go into, that aroused these emotions inside of me. It was so powerful that it scared me and I didn't know what to do with. Of course there was a lot of crying on the way to work and a few texts search for someone that might be awake at 7:00 am to lend a listening ear.
These emotions only caused me to eat quite a bit when I finally returned home. I know this and have much work to fix the emotional scar so deeply embedded inside of me. Could I beat myself up about the food I ate? Sure but it will not serve me well with all the pain I am feeling. I have gained control of the eating but now I must be kind to myself and learned to calm the pain inside of me. Until I do that I will never truly be free.

Goodbye Skinny Pants!

I have mixed emotions about sharing this with you but I figure if I am going to grow and learn that why not.
I always pick out my clothes the night before so that I am less stress in the morning. I do get up at 4:30 and head to the gym, come home shower, get ready, eat breakfast and head out the door by a little after 7:00. So this does help me.
I picked out my outfit and when I went to put on the pants they did not fit well at all. In the past this would have sent me for a loop with crying and beating myself. But this morning was different. I took them off got another pair that fit and started my day. I had to remind myself that those pants fit me at a weight that may not necessarily but a good weight for me. I have to continue to trust myself and my body to know what that it is. It may not be a weight or size that I like but one that will be doable that I can live with.
I continue to learn to trust and believe it myself and I know with each day I will become stronger and more self confident by doing so. I truly have come a long way!
Keep believe in yourself!

Have you tried on clothes that once fit and now are to small? How did you react? Have you come to peace with your body?

Spring Rolls!

I have had the wrappers to make Spring Rolls for a LONG time! I have seen these on a few blogs and I finally decided to give them a try. I was very nervous that I would be able to do it but I did! What a confidence booster!

I had to make quite a few because I wasn't sure how filling they would be for the hubby. I am trying to have Monday designated as meatless Monday! Not sure how keen the hubby is on it but to bad!

He has been designated as Sunday night for cooking duty so he can cook what every he wants. Last night was Spaghetti and Meatballs. I have been trying to eat more of a vegetarian diet but it looks like Sunday will probably be meat.

I bought the Operation Beautiful book and it has inspired me to attempt to get of the roller caster I have been on WAY to long. I weighed today and I have decided that will be the last time for awhile. I have to continue to remind myself I have good enough just the way I am. Since ending my training with my trainer I have put on 15 pounds and it has been difficult except but I am more than a number and I must continue to focus on that. I continue to eat clean food but I have admit I eat probably more than I need to. It is a journey and I will continue to grow and learn to love myself. I am good enough! I am love able! I am unique!

How do you except yourself as you are? Do you beat yourself up with negative talk?

I look forward to helping and giving anyone support who is on this journey with me.